Alien Conspiracy Unveiled
According to information in an article by Derek Thompson at The Atlantic Monthly, alien visitors have been exploiting us for decades. Making use of human weaknesses to carry out their insidious deeds right under our noses, in a manner guaranteed to not only sow doubt upon those who report their presence, but to cause serious question about their very existence.
The Hard Data on UFO Sightings: It’s Mostly Drunk People in the West
At least, that’s one interpretation.
Derek Thompson Jun 28 2014
The National UFO Reporting Center has received about 90,000 reported sightings of UFOs in the last 40 years, according to the Economist. That’s about six per day—with the majority happening on Fridays, in the West, and during, um, drinking hours.
What better way for alien visitors to carry out those tasks where they might be unavoidably seen than to do so when everyone is drunk, and no one will believe the witnesses?
Now it is important to remember this information comes from NUFORC, and not some crackpot organization with an agenda.
Of course, a race capable of traversing the stars only to come here and hide are not stupid. It is too easy to just blame it on alcohol so those tricky guys muddy the waters.
1. The correlation is weaker than it appears. Utah, the state with the lowest beer consumption by far, has a higher share of UFO sitings than North Carolina, the state with the highest beer consumption. Washington, the state where you’re most likely to report a UFO, drinks less alcohol than all but six states. There is more to the story than alcohol, sheeple.
2. We have several omitted variables, including direct line-of-sight to the sky and light contrast. It’s plausible that people don’t see UFOs while they’re working or sleeping because … they’re working in-doors and completely unconscious. What the Economist calls “drinking hours” are also the hours we’re most likely to be outside looking at anything bright contrasting with the dark sky.
All part of the plan, all part of the plan.
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Drunk Aliens by Rafael Vallaperde