I grew up in rural NWPA, surrounded in forest. I took an early interest in cryprozoology and sharks and have read many books on various crypto subjects such as Bigfoot and Megalodon over the years. I am not a professional writer or a journalist, but I do the best I can. I have a quirky, obscurely dry and sometimes sarcastic sense of humor than can get me in trouble. Some love me and some hate me, but I am who I am.

Doris Birch a 73 year old grandmother from Herne Bay (I’m assuming this is in the UK) says she is being plagued by a Poltergeist.

A former nursing home assistant, she claims her ghostly problems began about 4 months ago and has since become a major problem.

Doris says that the poltergeist touches her while she tries to sleep. “It’s like an octopus” said Doris, “I felt this creepy pair of hands”.

She has reached out to several people for help including a vicar, spirit medium and the local Methodist minister.

Here is her ghostly tale of terror:

‘It’s like an octopus groping me’: Grandmother, 73, claims she’s being plagued by a GHOST

Doris Birch's Apartment/ Building
A grandmother claims she is being haunted by a poltergeist who continually gropes her as she tries to sleep.

Doris Birch, of Herne Bay, began experiencing the nocturnal disturbances in her flat four months ago.

The 73-year-old said: ‘It’s like an octopus. I was lying in bed when I felt this creepy pair of hands.

‘I kicked frantically and it went away.

‘I’ve tried sleeping without the duvet. But it started shaking my mattress.

‘I even threw the mattress off the bed and bought a new one but it has made no difference.

‘This is very creepy and is giving me the jitters. It’s harassing me.

‘I need to call in the Ghostbusters.’

Mrs Birch, who lives alone, says she has consulted a vicar who believes the disturbances are being caused by a ‘lost spirit’, according to the Canterbury Times.

The former nursing home assistant has had a promise from a local husband-and-wife ghost hunting team to send the poltergeist packing.

Spirit medium Ray Herne says he will draw the ghost into him while his wife Beryl will capture it in a ‘vortex of light’ and send it to the ‘other side’.

Poltergeist activity has often been believed to be the work of malicious ghosts.

The word poltergeist comes from the German words poltern ‘to make a noise’ and geist ‘spirit’.

The term itself literally means ‘noisy ghost’ and victims often report inanimate objects being picked up and thrown, noises such as knocking, rapping and human voices – or even physical attacks.

Methodist Minister Hugh-Nigel Sheehan of the nearby United Church confirmed he had been approached by Mrs Birch but had been unable to help.

  • The Urban Dictionary tells me that Dorises are the best, and I believe it. I hope she can get rid of the frisky spirit, who obviously didn’t have any sexual harassment training in real life.

    Also, can the media stop telling us what poltergeist means? Like seriously, is there some sort of requirement that they must always include this sentence? “The word poltergeist comes from the German words poltern ‘to make a noise’ and geist ‘spirit’.” We know already!

  • Valkyrie, as a paranormal investigator and a author/journalist, we have to assume that people don’t know the meaning of our terminology. It might be redundant to those who are in the know, but it’s a necessary evil that must be done for those who don’t.

  • Hypnogogia IMO. Spirit Mediums and vicars who default to ‘lost spirits’ are only going to make the matter worse.
    Ray Hearne has obviously already made up is mind that this is paranormal activity and not disturbed sleeping patterns and confirmation bias at work.

  • Scott,

    yes it’s in UK, until the 70’s it had the second longest Pier in England or something uninteresting like that.

    http://www.ghosts.org.uk/ghost/3217/haunted/fort/reculver/herne-bay.html Is one of the reported hauntings around there.

    I would be more inclined to be interested had other tenants reported something odd around there too!